care. My aunt aged 80 recently became very depressed knowing she would soon have to make the decision to place her husband of 60 years into care. He has Altzeimers and had just started to get a little billigerant and wandering. Stressing about this placement she ended up having a breakdown and also got a bleeding ulcer. Anyway to cut a long story short she didnt improve so her son invocked his long ago awarded power of attorney, and both she and her hubby ended up, quite quickly, in a nursing home. So all the things she had collected and held dear in her lifetime, were turfed out of their home into the garage for a sale, her fabric, her patchworking tools, her sewing machines, and all the other little bits we all accumulate. People came and paid next to nothing for some of the things and others just got thrown out or donated to op shops. A lifetime of Joy, memories, and purchasing reduced to nothing but a few dollars. Of course the house had to be emptied, it needed to be sold to fund the nursing home, but it all just seems so pointless. So she who dies with the most fabric doesnt win after all. Ruth

you know, I have read everyones comments, and quite frankly I really don't care what happens to my things when I am gone...I WILL BE GONE and won't have to move it all...hehehehe......My poor hubby will just cuss me out for leaving it for him to pack up and git rid of....
meanwhile I have a good laugh now just thinking about him having to do it....He's always just shaking his head at me and telling me we have too much junk......deanna

You know I always thought of that. I don't have any daughters. I try like hell to get my god child into sewing. We really need to focus on leaving our knowledge to others. That is our greatest legacy we can leave and be remembered.

I have to admit this topic has had me thinking for several hours, recently because of my reply to clancy7.
After an hour+ of contemplation, I am completely convinced that if there is no one that shares an interest or a love of our addiction then we must "pay it forward"
Please anyone that has an addiction that no family member shares DONATE what you have and bless someone that is less fortunate!

When my mom died, our daughter lived in her house for a few yrs. A call went out at church for fabric scraps to take on a mission trip to be used in quilts. Remembering a huge bag of scraps, she went to the attic looking. SURE NUFF, THERE IT WAS. As she went thru the bag she found scraps of things GRANNY HAD MADE HER. she said it felt like she was throwing away pieces of Granny, but knew she was doing just what her Granny would do. I don't worry about what will happen to my statsh..just where in the world she's going to store them!

I have been enjoying what was left of my mother's and mother-in-law's sewing collections since I'm the only one in the family who sews. What will happen to my collection? It is worth far more than there collections. We have no children or close family. Hopefully whoever buys it at the garage sale will enjoy it as much as I have.

1 comment

by psssst 27 Apr 2010

Donate it. Trust me the person that receives it will thank God for their great find, and they will also be thanking you indirectly. I shop thrift stores all of the time and I feel very blessed when I find something I can use and my purchase helps the store.

My sister and I have a pact. If either of us dies, the other one is to come to her house and take all the sewing stuff away back to her place. She'll have to rent a U-HAUL to get all my stuff.

This is such a terrible indictment of your aunt's son. What an uncaring person. I agree that we should all make a will stating who gets what so that, hopefully, someone will cherish the things we cherish. I have my grandmother's Singer treadle sewing machine and many other things that belonged to her, and to my aunt, who had no children. And these things are unbelievably precious to me. To see them reminds me of the dearly loved people who have died whom I truly miss. My grandchildren will inherit all of my "family heirlooms" like my grandmother's treadle machine, but I know my granddaughter probably won't ever want to sew so I'm hoping one of my husband's granddaughters will want my other sewing things when the time comes. But also, like the psssst lady said, it is just "stuff" and Jesus Christ as our Savior should be the most important thing in our life.

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by joann13100 27 Apr 2010

Some people are not in the least sentimental. When my Grandma passed away, my Dad let us keep whatever we wanted, and what no one wanted was sold to defray the funeral costs. Grandma never got rid of anything, so there was a lot of stuff. We kept all the quilt tops she never finished, and her finished quilts. I still have a few unfinished quilts to work on---

This is sad. My mother and grandmother's sewing boxes are sitting on my dining table as they have just come into my keeping. It is very sad that one persons loved posessions are not someone else. I remember my mother being sad that her friend/neighbour died suddenly and all her sewing and knitting ended up in a sale room, my mother would have taken the unfinished crafts and completed them. As I am slowly sorting my late mothers home and we are trying to pass on as much as we can where it will be loved and wanted

I personally will not be going in a nursing home, have discussed this in length with my son and DIL. but I do have a GD now and hopefully she will be a sewer too, if not I have a niece that I sew with and she would love to have my stuff she drools now LOL I do know what you mean about no one to take things or the yard sales. I have purchased things from them, but at least if someone is buying it you know they will enjoy it.

Oh Ruth, that is so sad. Well when i go, I have told my daughter, if nobody in the family shows an interest she must donate it to a charity that teachers others to sew. Im sure they will be very pleased with my stash, and my Machines - Hugs Yvonne

I have thought of this, but am in denial, I don't want to go there!!! Hugs, Judy

I have tons of fabric which I will probable never use. What my sister doesn't want I will leave to a friend and my quilting clubs. They always can use more fabric. Mildred

I'm 67, but have been slowly "getting ducks in a row" lol. I too have many of my mothers knitting needles as well as a ton of my own. My sister never did anything with needles, lol, and I don't see the grand kids that much with bad economy. I've told oldest grand daughter that my sewing room is hers. Hopefully I'll be around a bit till the youngest gets older and maybe will learn. When I was a kid, we had sewing in school 5th-9th grade. Why of why don't they do that now. At least then we could donate our stuff to the schools. Have done that with golf clubs, etc. I'm always on the hunt for someone's old button box, as I treasure mine.

It is a dilemma.

All of this discussion makes me think of my Aunt Tess. She lived to be 100...at about age 90, she decided to start giving things away. She delighted many neices and nephews (she had no children herself) with things she had treasured. When she passed away - there wasn't that much "stuff" to go through! She was some woman - very practical and very generous. I miss her!

3 comments

by smithandsmith 27 Apr 2010

100 !!! thats great. I tell my children that i'm going to live to be 100 and then i'm coming back. lol

by msfancyvip 27 Apr 2010

That's what my grandmother did dailylaundry, she doled out speicific things to those she felt would best appreciate and want it. I was VERY pleased to get her sewing treasures...right down to her old tin of Buttons...and I absolutely CHERISH it. I hope I have the opportunity and fortitude to take her path. ~Rita

by dailylaundry 27 Apr 2010

Rita, I hope that I can do the same. By giving away treasures while alive - she enjoyed everyone else's joy...it makes such good sense. Laura

Your comment is very timely and hits hard with me. My mother had very little growing up. After we kids left the nest she began to collect. Now her collection holds the house walls up. Every piece has a story as to why its there. Although most of these bits of her collection has less affection to me they are her stories and that is what makes her feel happy. Therfore they are priceless.
She had to place my father into a home last Thursday after caring for him for 62 years and it devestated her to know that she can't care for him any longer. These treasures will help her get through the days. Right or wrong, good or bad, I can't imagine having to take these treasures from her. I even considered getting a storage unit when the time comes and put my treasures in it too. Let my son deal with when we are both gone!

My daughter just will throw all the fabric and thread away the first day, put the machines in the garage and when cleaning the garage will throw them away too.****

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by dailylaundry 27 Apr 2010

Dear - then you must think of someone who would enjoy them and leave strick instructions in a will for them to go to who you want...even a neighbor or friend!!! They will be touched and delighted!

by cloey 28 Apr 2010

I did wills for 11 years before my stroke. Make sure you put in a codicil to your will indicating your intentions.

Don't get me wrong I enjoy my stashes and my collections, but when it comes down to it, it's just stuff. My daughter can take it all now, later, throw it away, sell it, burn it, or donate it.
I do warn my daughter that someday when she has to sort through all of this she will be so busy and overwhelmed she will most likely be mad at me and thus not mourn me too much hahaha.
People put too much value on material items, and it causes such sorrow and hard feeleings in some families.
I carry with me the only collection I need Jesus Christ is my Savior and I love that collection.

2 comments

by mariahail 27 Apr 2010

Well said psssst!!!*****

by smithandsmith 27 Apr 2010

you are so right pssst. I tell my children just to have a big garage sale and take the money and have a great dinner on me. Or pull up a dumpster and get rid of it. I really don't want to put any stress on them. Life is too short to worry about details. Have fun.
hugs lee

I have heard this story over and over. Please make a will. My mother, before she died, gave certain items to family members so there would be litle decision making. She also paid and planned her funeral. It makes it so much easier on the survivors. I have designated in my will that my sewing/craft stuff goes to a friend.

What ever happened to taking care of your elderly in the family home? It seems that the world had advanced so much over the years that we have forgotten whats really important in life. So, it makes me wonder--have we really advanced at all? Sometimes I wish we could do away with all this fast pace technology and go back in time. We would have to keep the machines and this great site,of course!!!--lol

This is a sad story.
I keep asking my 74 years old Mum to sort out as much as she can but I still see so much stuff in their house. She was doing a lot of knitting and her cupboards are full of wool ! My 4 brothers says: "Oh Cathie will dill with it !! ". 3 of them lives in France and I am in England.
It will be a long job !

I guess it wouldn't matter to me and I would rather not want to know. My 2 daughters sometimes reminds me that the machines are going to be this theirs. I am often reminded that I need to take good care of their "inheritance" and we all just laugh.

Perhaps a good reason to put it all down in a will, and let the relatives know that you have done so. ***

Our young people are not instread in sewing any more there is very few I have young people come to just cut off a pair of jeans for shorts. I don't know what will hapen to my stuff I worked hard to pay for my machines and I would hope if they are sold they will get good money for them. I bought a old singer feather weight a lady had that was her mothers for 20.00 I just could not stand to see it sold again for that much I try to get my husband into makeing quilts and embroidery he is a lot younger that me and he could use them to amuse him self .or maybe his young neice will learn to sew and would love to have them I don't know I may leave a request as to what to do with mine I just don't know.LenaMae

This really is a sad story. I think creating things helps to keep you young and her son could have taken a little time and made sure she had some of her dear items with her in the nursing home. I know my daughter will want my things...thank goodness she sews and is very crafty! Hehehe, but, I am like Meganne - can't I please take a few things with me? Hehehe!!!*

I have a roomful of fabric, more than I could ever use in a lifetime! Three quilting frames, four sewing machines, and thread(more than I can count). My daughter has asked me what she should do with all my treasures if the need arrises, I guess I really don't want to know.

Very touching story Ruth. It's a shame that people don't value things as others do. My mother use to always give me things to keep for her. She said I always took care of it. I still have my GM scissors, sewing machine and other items. I have some items from my grant aunt too. People have turned into money hogs instead of BLESSING someone else who can't do anything for you. Someone who will use it and take care for it, is of so much value. In a time as this all we can do is PRAY and tell God about it. It's sad but everyone WILLNOT do the right thing but in the end they will not have any peace and wish they did. I live by and see, when you don't do right do right don't come to you.

I think of my father who helped this lady and she willed him her house. Her own family didn't want to do anything but beat her out of her money. My father fixed the house up and has lived in it about 4 yrs now.

Praying that you will Be ENCOURAGED in a time such as this *2U

What a cold hearted person her son must be!

I should hope my sons would pace more value on the treasures they know their Mum has cherished and if they don't then at least I think my DIL would and I am hoping I live long enough to establish a bond with my Granddaughters so that they will want their Gram's collections.

Otherwise I just might have to purchase a mausoleum large enough to house it all and make sure it is buried with me for the afterlife, like the ancient Pharoahs. LOL!!!

I have all my Mum's wool and knitting needles & patterns and I have been cleaning out MIL's house and she said I could have all her sewing stuff, and with it came a lot of her Mother's sewing things. I just treasure all the beautiful buttons and sewing knick-knacks.

Hugs n Roses, Meg

2 comments

by pennifold 27 Apr 2010

This is a sad indictment on today's society isn't it Meg? I used to love sitting around Nanna's treadle sewing machine and play with her button tin.

I have several hundreds of buttons so that when the grandchildren come over and they see me in my sewing room they know they can play with them.

I hope some of them will have the gift of sewing etc. so I can at least give them things "sewing related".

Love and blessings Chris

by lenamae 27 Apr 2010

My granny taught me how to sew by hand when I was just a little girl and I taught my self to sew on a treddle machine when I was 12 years old could not affors to buy patterns so I made my own and made skirts and blouses for my sis and me using flower sacks.Lena Mae

They could at least leave her machines and some sewing stuff to go with her. Love Marie

Your story really touched my heart Ruth. I too have had to sort, sell and move things for family. It's was so hard to pack up and get rid of things. I did it for my granny who's daughter made her move into a nursing home. The family didn't get along and had words over everything and poor granny was caught in the middle of her own children fighting over everything. It was horrible. She ended up living in the nursing home until she died 15 years later. The sad thing was, she didn't want to leave her home and she was always in total control of her mind and new what was going on all the time. I went every tuesday for 15 years and did her laundry. I really miss her. I got rid of most of my collection when i separated from my husband of 26 years, but i'm back to sewing and collecting again!!!
hugs Lee

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by noah 27 Apr 2010

Wow poor you 26 years down the drain thats so sad:(:(Carolyn

by smithandsmith 27 Apr 2010

thanks Carolyn.. it was one of the hardest things i have ever done. It's been 5 years and i still care. But i'm happy now and i have a new partner and he loves me dearly :)
hugs lee