have you noticed the shameless begging for more flowers to be given? The flowers are given for your participation in the group, asking or answering questions, or making comments on others posts, or making posts of your own, etc. Come on Cuties, earn those flowers, stop asking for handouts!

Let us not be assuming or accusatory of others; we know NOT what is in their hearts and minds. Let us be thankful that our own heart is uplifted, and that our giving a simple flower may assist another in becoming so! I did not know until recently, and have been a member of Cute for quite a long time, as to how flowers were received, given, or why! Do not take this as meaning I am mentally deficient, but have focused on learning and enjoying many other aspects of Cute. This is a great versatile group, so talented and helpful in the realm of machine embroidery, as well as caring and emphathizing towards others. There is no room for "pettiness" within a "family". The Cute Family is the best; keep it positive! May the Lord bless us all!
Angel

1 comment

by airyfairy 06 Dec 2010

Thank you for your words. Sarah.

The flowers have no purpose at all but to let you know that someone hears what you say and comments either by leaving a flower or commenting on what you say. They make you feel like a part of a wonderful group but there again, the group is what you make it by your own comments. If you do not join in and act as part of the group, you are not going to receive many flowers. If every comment that you make is a complaint of some kind(and we have had a few of those also), you are are not going to receive alot of flowers. I have crippling arthritis and I hurt a great deal of the time. When I am feeling bad and it hurts to sit at the computer a long time, I am guilty of not saying a word to anyone but just checking in and reading the news and collecting the designs that I want and leaving flowers and going back to a comfortable spot for my back and legs. That does not happen very often but it does happen. I have noticed that the least you have to say to others when you are hee, the less flowers you receive. That is just a common reaction. If you do not interact with everyone else in the group and let them know how important they are and how much they are appreciated for all that they do, you are not going to get any nice comments or flowers. The flowers are to show appreciation for your being here and caring about what goes on. I usually come on in the mornings very early and read the comments and then check out the designs and go onto the projects. Once in a while, I go and check out the DBC section, which I may add that I spent over an hour there last night looking at some very nice new designs that I had not seen before. I also made some very nice discoveries in the projects section and made comments on some I had managed to miss when they were posted. I do not pay much attention to the flowers as long as I am joining in but I do tend to notice that when I do not comment on the postings and the projects that they do not increase very much. EVERYONE likes to be appreciated and if you do not take the time to comment or to help the other members, you are being inactive and so are the flowers. I did not even notice them for the first couple of months after I started joining in until I read a comment from someone else about the flowers. I have been here a long time part of which I did not say a word. I also have been a member of another very large group for the same length of time and I have only posted (1)one thing the whole time I have been there. I let everyone know that one of the members' husband had passed away and I have not even been back to check the comments. I do not feel like a part of the group there and we are talking years, not months that I have been a member. I think it was 2006 when I joined there.

The members here are kind, helpful, and friendly and I finally found the courage to join in and have enjoyed it every single minute since I posted the first message. The people here and not the flowers,are what brings me back everyday off and on until I finally go to bed at night. I get up early and I go to bed late and my only other company most days are my furbabies. They both have there second beds in my office/craft room.

I thank each and everyone of you for being here when I need company and/or help with something!!!!! I appreciate the wonderful posts from Sissi, Gerry, and Sewmom everyday that save all of us from having to search for all of the new free designs from the other sites. I also thank all of you that share your finds with all of us and share your knowledge with all of us. We also have some wonderful digitizers right here at Cute that are always ready and willing to help when they can. Yvonne and Meganne are just two that are almost always ready for a challenge to help one of us when we need help but forgive me for not listing all by name, there are alot more that give their talents freely!

When I come on in the morning, I usually go down the line in each section that I open and give flowers to everyone. It is just my way of saying thank you for all you do with and for the group. If you stop and think about it, it is not the flowers that are important, it is the person. If you give to to everyone, then everyone feels like a part of the group. If uou take time to make a nice comment you just might make someone have a nicer day! Don't be stingy with the flowers. For some of us they are more important than we may think. It takes so little to make someone smile if you are being honest and really care. I hope all of you have a wonderful day and so sorry for the long post. It would have been much longer if I had taken the time to thank each and everyone by name and deed!

if you look at the date i joined and the flowers i have, u will know that i cannot be bother with flowers. maybe initial stage but i have grow very fast out of that stage hehehe.

they are just flowers, cannot be taken out from the monitor, cannot exchange for $ or things etc. just some gratitude shown. however i wont say that those ladies are 'begging' for flowers. whats so nice to 'beg' for such virtual items? they are just more excited and maybe over excited than rest of the people abt flowers.

When Im reading the answers to a question, I read all the way down the page to the last reply and while scrolling back up to the answer, I give out a flower to all those who answered. Its my way of acknowledging the time the person took to answer a question for the asker.
When you ask a question here its normally something that you have bee thinking of for a bit or an area where you are stuck and need help. Its normally a bit of a big deal for the asker, and to even get one reply, even one piece of advice or a suggestion can help the asker out so so much.
Thats the beauty of this site, a big deal to one person can be easily fixed up and solved by a very quick answer from someone else. That kind of service is priceless, unique and encouraging.
The support and friendship and laughs had here on a personal level are amazing, Ive never seen the like of it anywhere else, even in grops where people meet face to face.
Above are what I think make Cute Embroidery so special, and they should always be the main reasons cuties vist, the flower....well they are just an added extra, a token of appreciation, and a bit of fun! I get a little lift each time I get one, but its not the reason I visit here so often.

2 comments

by leenova54 06 Dec 2010

Well said!

by ansalu 06 Dec 2010

I agree and another 4you :o)

It's a pity the tags aren't used much more than now, everything seems to be 'general'. It's so much easier to skip what you don't want to see if tags like digitising, help, quilt, embroidery, voting-request, to name a few, were added to a question. I love to help out on embroidery questions, but now you have to go through the list to get to them.

3 comments

by ansalu 06 Dec 2010

Hello morps,
was this the comment for Megannes post about how to posting in the right category? Seems a little bit to me? ;o)
Greetings, Bettina

by ansalu 06 Dec 2010

SORRY script-error! should be: mops (maybe I woun't write it cause I don't like those dogs cause of the sound the ymake when breathing so heavy? :o)

by mops 06 Dec 2010

You made me laugh, I don't like those dogs either, I just mxed up when I first logged in, wanted to put mpos.
Maybe I should have added it to Meganne's post instead of here. But I did not mean the TABs above but the TAGs (list on the left) you can add to your question or remark when you post it.
Skipping the 'flower' questions would be easy with tags and any thing else we don't have the time or energy for on a given day.

Flowers for everyone ...sometimes you just need a flower if you are feeling low. I say FLOWERS FOR All ...skip the posts you don't want to read

I see the flower story is back. I agree with every word that has been said. The flowers are great but they are not the reason that we come to the Cute site. Meganne suggested the other day that the PERSONAL tab is there if we want to mention "every day" things ie: the weather etc. Let us use the COMMUNITY tab for all our sewing needs - which I am sure that is it's purpose. Thank you Honeychyle for your comments. Let us all give a little and not worry about the taking. Hugs &*4U. Sarah.

4 comments

by meganne 06 Dec 2010

Correction Please Sarah, if you're going to quote someone please don't use your own interpretation.

I said: "the Personal Tab, is supposed to be where you post messages you don't want the whole world (general public) to see as soon as they open CuteE."

I really dislike being misquoted, it can lead to very big misunderstandings.

thanks, Meganne

by airyfairy 06 Dec 2010

I am very sorry I misquoted you. It will not happen again. Please accept my apologies. Sarah.

by lindalee757 06 Dec 2010

Ouch!!

by meganne 07 Dec 2010

No harm done Sweetie, it's something we all have to watch, isn't it? :-)
Hugs n roses, Meganne

Very true, there appears to be a lot of that going on here. I like to go back to my posts and throw the flowers to all whom have responded. Helen

2 comments

by ansalu 05 Dec 2010

That's what I also did. Will honor everybody who has taken the time to give an answer to one of my questions.

by leenova54 06 Dec 2010

Same here!

You have made a great point - being one with alot of flowers - one would thinkg that I crave receiving them - the biggest point that most CUTE members forget - you have to partcipate in the CUTE family for the real rewards of being part of it - get involved in the discussions, make a point - at times check back - to see if someone answered your quesiton - or comment again on something that was said - go around and give other's that have made good comments a pat on the back - by leaving them with a flower - you can only give one at a time - so you can double back to give them another - but if someone else came along after you did - they too deserve to be respected with a pat on the back, too. If you see something that pleases you - in the projects - leave them a flower - say something - leave one with the other's, too. I do know in the beginning the flower thing was something that Miss V. deviced for a reason - what it was - we have no idea - but we took it upon ourselves to enjoy the use of it - but watering everyone's garden - to use it as a tool for marking what questions we had read. Also to give a thanks and to reward someone for being kind to another. We are a huge family and we have many here that don't even understand how to play well with others - but we do try - we allow things to go on - if it doesn't harm another - we try to allow each to find their way - we do this for each other - to be of service to the site - we keep on keep on - so that the site will evolve - some say - - it never changes - but it does - it has good times - bad times - things & people rotate - some come and go - some stay. If you like this site - enjoy the fellowship of it - the family feeling that you get when you come - try to not jump on other's for the way they think or how they perceive that things work - be the best you - that you can be and be a great example to the others - if your comment - will hurt someone - maybe saying it - should be done in private or not at all. Let's keep this site - as it was intended for the love of embroidery and the kinship that we feel for one and another. Have a great day - unless you have other plans.

1 images:[1]

6 comments

by fannyfurkin 05 Dec 2010

Shirlene, you have made a good point about not saying things that may be hurtful. I recognize that I am one of the offenders here, but I must add that there are worse things than asking for flowers. I personally am one that gets very upset quite easily by things and I do take things very personally. I had a recent issue on this site where every time I said anything I was criticized by another. I chose to ignore this and I very nearly never came back. It was only through the support and friendship from another cutie who knew what was happening that made me rise above it.
At the end of the day this is what it is about the friends that we make and the help that we can give each other. We all have different personalities and different ways of looking at things. I had no idea that people were bothered by others asking for flowers, but now I do.

by shirlener88 05 Dec 2010

Alice, stick around - no need to go - if you think you have been critized - believe me - I have had them all from one or another at one time - I do what I do - because I enjoy the CUTE family and believe in the site - please use the personal column more - you will be surprised how much support you get from it dear. You can always PM another or email them - if you need to talk more openly. Hugs!

by fannyfurkin 06 Dec 2010

Thank you Shirlene. I too believe in this site and the people that I feel are my family. I have had a lot more good experiences than bad, and I have made some great friends.

by jayce 06 Dec 2010

I have felt the same as you Alice, But the positives far out weigh the negatives on this site so I choose to stay

by claudenicolas 06 Dec 2010

Dear Shirlene you have said all that so well, it would have been difficult for me to find the words

by leenova54 06 Dec 2010

I always forget to look at the personals! I look at general, projects and dbc and that's about all. Now and then I remember to look at personals but since I have been here (Feb 2010) I have only read personals a few times and that was only within the last couple of months. I also forget to look at my private tab unless someone leaves a message that someone has a PM and then I am like, oh yeah, forgot to look.

I am guilty as charged! Please forgive me. I hadn't been feeling well and needed cheering up I guess. It won't happen again. I give out tons of flowers. I hate to see a zero next to someones flower! I promise,I will behave in the future. I hope you will forgive me.
Meri

3 comments

by shirlener88 05 Dec 2010

Meri, whne you are not feeling well - let us know - the personal section is best for this - we will be happy to lend you and ear and try our best to cheer you up dear. *4U

by eyeztodiefor10 05 Dec 2010

TY Shirlene, I will do that from now on. You're such a sweetie! Meri

by leenova54 06 Dec 2010

Cuties are here when you feel the need, be it a bad embroidery day, bad hair day or just a bad day. We are a shoulder to lean on or to cry on or to lift us to the sky when we are overjoyed. Feel free to unload, if someone is offended they can pass on by but if you feel better venting, then by all means vent and we will respond and you will feel better!

Which reminds me of something vaguely related. When someone (probably accidentally) hits the submit button twice and ends up with the same reply showing from them twice, I often wonder if I should skip the copy when dishing out flowers -sometimes I'm a bit too speedy at running down the side with clicks, so they would be getting 2 flowers for one reply, otherwise, really :)

2 comments

by danababes 06 Dec 2010

I'm one of those who sometimes accidentally double posts, but its because I have a dodgy mouse that has a mind of its own when it wants to double-click or my internet hiccups. I go back and say sorry for the double post, but I certainly wouldnt expect a flower for my mistake :) xXx

by ansalu 08 Dec 2010

My mouse has also bad days and when it happens that I made a double post I click on the triangle with the excamationmark and send it with the request to Miss Veronika to delete one of the two (learned this here in a post a few weeks ago and it works wonderful).
Greetings, Bettina

We all love our flowers but yes, sometimes some of us get carried away. I did celebrate when I hit the big numbers but I also try to contribute. Flowers for everyone, lol!

1 comment

by fannyfurkin 05 Dec 2010

I know what you are saying, and I think that we both agree that last thing we want to do is upset our friends here on this great site. The friendship here is worth way more than the flowers.

I enjoy my flowers too, and I just gave one to all when I read their comments. But the flowers are far from the best of this site. I enjoy the "familiness" of Cute. Being a part of such a large area of wonderful people. Thanx guys for letting me be your friend! Hugs, Judy

LOL... you're funny, and hit the nail on the head. Is this part of the entitlement mentality we see so readily these days? :-)

3 comments

by daisy530 05 Dec 2010

There you are! Missed you *

by simplyrosie 06 Dec 2010

:-) I'm here... I pop in ever now and then. The "drama" becomes overwhelming on CUTE and I back away for a while focusing on things more important in life. xoxo

by mad14kt 06 Dec 2010

Hey Terri!!!

the Top Contributors no longer show up I suspect someday the flowers will also disappear. if they did I will still come here for the friendship, support and caring. it's not about the flowers .
Bev

I know that I am guilty of this and I am very sorry for offending anyone. I will not do it again. I do however help people as much as I can and give flowers to everyone who responds to my questions. Again I am very sorry if I have offended any one and it will not happen again.
Alice

1 comment

by leenova54 05 Dec 2010

No worries Alice, we all love to see our flowers grow.

You are not the first, and you won't be the last, person who feels this way. Alas, humans will be humans and there will always be those who want something for nothing and then want to make a competition out of it.

Flowers are meant to be a Cute little way to say thanks, they aren't worth anything if you don't earn them by giving of yourself but, sadly, those who push their flowers up in this way don't have the principles to know the difference anyway.

At least the majority of Cuties know they have "earned" their flowers by participating, caring, sharing, giving help and support to other Cuties in need. And the only people this message will offend are those who are guilty of 'cadging' flowers.

It used to mean something very special when Jerrilyn gave you a (Cyber) Tiara when you reached a special milestone....................

Hugs n roses, Meganne

2 comments

by lbrow 05 Dec 2010

Meg my dear as always u r sooooo right. I loves ya./Lillian

by claudenicolas 06 Dec 2010

Dear Meganne you are right

I totally agree. What's up with that lately anyway? When I first found this site and signed up to be a part of it-flowers wasn't the main topic-embroidery designs,projects, hints and tips was...that was what I thought was so neat about it. Now it seems like so many are focused on getting more flowers or begging you to go to their web site, which only makes me less likely to look at their sites or respond to their me, me, me posts.~linda~

4 comments

by sewist1 05 Dec 2010

agree

by noah 05 Dec 2010

i to agree

by meganne 05 Dec 2010

Don't worry Linda, it goes in cycles so it will die down again, eventually. :-)
Hugs n roses, Meganne

by ansalu 05 Dec 2010

You know I agree ;o)

I have passed the 1,000 - 5,000 - 10,000 flower marks without fanfare so I'm annoyed with the ones that think it's an easy way to get more. They need to earn them with participation like you mentioned. Also noticed that when some ask a question they don't go back and give flowers for the responses. Would it be better to not have the flowers? who knows . . .

2 comments

by mranderson 05 Dec 2010

Every time I come on here I check my flowers not because I am looking for flowers. So I can go back to my posts or answers and give flowers back to whom ever has made a comment and to read the comment. I am sure people only want flowers to promote themselves. (Oops! did I say that).

by leenova54 05 Dec 2010

Marge you are funny, lol!

Huh?

* for your comment. I agree and find there are such frequent postings that the embroidery can take second place. Apologies if I offend anyone