by leenova54 14 Dec 2011

Oncologist today 12/14/2011

First off, I am going to the Cleveland Clinic on the 20th and let them go over my records and see if they have some experimental treatment or anything new though I don't want to be running up there all the time.

The tests showed more activity of cancer in the front right of my skull and in the back toward the left. There is a spot on my spine in the neck, lower lumbar a bit above the tailbone, a lot of activity in the ribs more so on the left though the right is where I am hurting so bad. There is activity in both hip sockets more so in the left there also. It is growing and moving a lot more than it was before.

I know this is hard to read but I am not ready to give up, I am going to fight this with every stubborn bone in my body and have no intentions of letting this get the better of me!

The plan with my oncologist is for chemo and maybe some radiation but we haven't set that up yet because we want to see what Cleveland Clinic says first. I'd say try not to worry but I know that isn't possible. Not curable. Thank you for all your prayers and kind words and cards and angels (and butterfly). I will be here for a long time I am sure!

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by dilceia 22 Dec 2011

Oh, my dear...My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I love you!You are very important for us! kisses

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 22 Dec 2011

Thank you so much.

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by mary51 21 Dec 2011

how did it go ??????? Debra hope Cleveland Clinic said something good.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 21 Dec 2011

Just recommended a combo of chemo drugs 3 days in a row then off 3 weeks with a max of 6 times. No better chances than before, gonna look into some other options too. I should post a new one after the 28th.

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by noah 21 Dec 2011

ah Deb,your making me cry *** will keep praying hugs carolyn

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 21 Dec 2011

Now now, I told my friend to put on her big girl panties and stop crying or I will too, lol!!

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by sewbadly 21 Dec 2011

Best wishes with the new chemo and pain meds.
Sorry there were not other options at the Cleveland Clinic for you.
Hang tough.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 21 Dec 2011

Thanks, I am going to give it all I have. Hubby and I cried enough yesterday and I don't want to waste time crying but I wish I could get my butt in gear and embroider some stuff! I hate taking the pain meds, my directions has that I can take up to 8 a day, that's too much, my top amount has been 5 at this point and usually less than that.

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by bowlds 21 Dec 2011

ttt

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by bowlds 20 Dec 2011

Best wishes on the dr. visit. I'm with you on the 'give it to me staight' thing. It's easier to deal with if you are sure they are telling you everything. You want no surprises.
Cathy

2 comments
leenova54 by leenova54 20 Dec 2011

Pretty much got the same answers. Going to do a different chemo and pain meds is about all they can offer.

bowlds by bowlds 21 Dec 2011

I've been watching for news of your Cleveland clinic appt. I didn't think to look here. Hopefully the different chemo will help you.

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by aleene 20 Dec 2011

Know that I am asking God to do his will in your life. That is to prosper and be in good health, and to keep you pain free. Get good news today I pray!

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 20 Dec 2011

Thank you, we are off to the clinic in just a bit here and boy do I ever hope they have good news but I want the truth, no false hope from the doctors.

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by sewbadly 19 Dec 2011

Good wishes on your visit to the Cleveland Clinic tomorrow. As you can see, so many are pulling for a good resolution for you.... all around the world.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 19 Dec 2011

Thank you so much, I have found so much love on this site.

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by ksgram1 18 Dec 2011

If love could cure you, you'd never have gotten ill to start with. You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. You might want to ask your doctor if he/she has ever heard of GoChi juice. It changes the PH in your body from acid to alcoline (sp?) It is said that cancer cannot grow in an alcoline environment. It worked for my husband. Big Hugs, Marjorie

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 18 Dec 2011

Have not heard of it. I'll ask. Thanks!

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by judybell 18 Dec 2011

Debra, as always I am lifting you up in prayer. I pray you will feel God's loving arms around you holding you tight as you go through this illness. Hugs, Judy

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 18 Dec 2011

Thank you, I need all I can get now.

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by mary51 18 Dec 2011

Always keep you in my prayers, hope you have a good answer this Tuesday. God and the angles to protect you!

2 comments
mary51 by mary51 18 Dec 2011

angels!!!!!

leenova54 by leenova54 18 Dec 2011

Thank you so much, so many angels and prayers, hopefully God has the answer and it is the one I want.

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by amyb 18 Dec 2011

I have been thinking of you. I woke up this morning to come and see if you had written an update. I am still praying for you. I just had hip surgery and I am lifting you up. (Look into olive leaf extract and oil of oregano. An oncologist I know said olive leaf extract an oil of oregano can "work" miracles.)

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 18 Dec 2011

Thanks, I'll check it out!

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by cfidl 18 Dec 2011

Debra, thank you for the update. You are in my thoughts and prayers daily and I know you will fight this thing until it knows who is boss!

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 18 Dec 2011

Thank you, I am trying my best.

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by jacquipaul 16 Dec 2011

Debra, my thoughts and prayers are with you, and if your attitude is strong, I'm sure this cancer is in for a fight. God bless you.
Love and hugs,
Jacqueline

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 16 Dec 2011

Thank you, I am sure trying, I just read over my test results again and the more I read the more I don't like what it says. I'm not ready to give up yet though.

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by almag 16 Dec 2011

Dear Debra - been thinking of you so much and wondering how things have been going for you, so thank you for the update, although it's not what any of us wanted to hear.
I am in touch with My Friend Upstairs daily, asking for a Christmas Miracle to be sent your way. We never know what form miracles will take but I'm asking for the very best of medical knowledge and the very best of doctors to see you through this battle. Miracles do happen - hang on to that thought and just keep on believing it.
AlmaG.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 16 Dec 2011

Thank you so much, He knows what is happening and He is hearing from a lot of people about it so I just have to keep going while He decides what to do with me, does he really want someone with my warped sense of humor up there?? LOL!!!

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by zoefzoef 16 Dec 2011

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 16 Dec 2011

Thank you so much, if God isn't on my side by now he better be with all the prayers he is receiving!

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by shirlener88 16 Dec 2011

I am praying for you daily - I know how strong you are fighting this battle and that you will continue to do so - PLEASE know that the CUTE family PRAYER WARRIORS are on the job. If there is anything that we can do - in posting to you - that will help - let us know - talk to us - each day - if it helps - you are amazing and I can see by some other postings that you haven't lost your sense of humor and that is so presious - contact me - if you need anything.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 16 Dec 2011

Thanks so much Shirlene, I know I have many praying for me and I have some angles for my tree to prove it! Never lose the sense of humor, lots of people think I am warped but I don't care, LOL! Lemonade from lemons always!

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by sdrise 15 Dec 2011

All our hearts thoughts and prayers are with you. Keep a positive attitude and fight like a warrior. We are here for anything you need. Suzanne

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you so much, fighting and hanging tough is the plan!

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by bevgrift 15 Dec 2011

Dearest Debra,
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
May God Bless and Give you Strength!
Hugs Bev

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, that is all I could ask for. My hubby needs me here, my parents need me and so do my grown up sons so I have no choice but to fight with all I have!

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by jrob Moderator 15 Dec 2011

Debra- this isn't the post I wanted to read, but we don't always get what we want. I'm so happy to hear that you are putting on your big girl panties and staring this stupid disease down! Please feel us behind you, sending up prayers and giving you hugs and high fives! Bless you. ;)

5 comments
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you so much. I am not happy with the news but I don't plan on giving up and I have so many people in my corner to prop me up when I need it! Who would have thought that people in so many different countries would care about me?

jrob by jrob 20 Dec 2011

We did!

shirlener88 by shirlener88 21 Dec 2011

And we know WHY you were brought to us, too

ansalu by ansalu 21 Dec 2011

And we stick at you like a chewing gum ;o)
Whatever we can do to lift you up please let us know...
Big hugs my dear
Bettina

leenova54 by leenova54 21 Dec 2011

Thank you all, my special angel friends!

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by anne55 15 Dec 2011

My prayers are with you also. I agree with Meganne, fight this with every ounce of strength you have and never give up. Stay positive. The Cute family is here for you. I send you big hugs and much love. I pray God will hold you in His loving arms and strengthen you every minute of every day.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you so much. I am strong and I have to fight, can't give up and refuse to sit and die!

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by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

OK Cuties, I just noticed something as I was responding to Michemb (Michelle), while I have been reading and responding to these messages you all so kindly send me that I am not in pain at this moment and I have not taken a pain pill yet this morning! Cuties are lifting me up! My whole group of guardian angels at work I think! Thank you all! Hugs to each one of you!

2 comments
meganne by meganne 16 Dec 2011

Being pain free makes the fighting easier so I hope this continues for you Debra.
hugs n love, Meganne

shirlener88 by shirlener88 16 Dec 2011

This is very good new - how wonderful.

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by mary51 15 Dec 2011

Oh Debra! you are so brave, I admire you, keep up your positive thought. God be with you all the time!

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, sometimes I lose it for a tiny bit but so far only one tissue times.

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by meganne 15 Dec 2011

My prayers are with you Debra and my tears reading this are tears of anger and frustration.
I hate this insidious disease, it is so indiscriminate and so relentless.
You fight girl, you fight with every fibre of your being, don't waste time on negative thoughts (I know you won't) and let us all pray for you.
We won't stop, we won't waiver, we are all with you and I hope our love will help you cope with what you must.
love and prayers, Meganne

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

It is Meganne, it truly is, I have no pain at this moment. I hope you are doing well right now too and that you get good news very soon. My thoughts and prayers are with you too!

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by michemb 15 Dec 2011

Dear Debra,
So sad to hear the news was not what you had hoped. They say that attitude and positive thinking is a great healer, that along with all the prayers and support cuties from around the world are giving you will help you through this. Your angel will also look over you, take this one day at a time, some may be harder than others.
Hugs
Michelle

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

I think that when my treatment time comes I will pack all my little angels in the bag I take along and keep them with me to touch and look at and let the nurses see. Times are going to be tough but it's strange, I just now noticed that as I read these responses and reply to them my ribs are not hurting right now and I didn't take a pain pill yet this morning. Wow!

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by grandmamek 15 Dec 2011

Dear Debra, I am so sorry for your news you received. I know you have a fighting attitude and with this and your positive thinking, you will beat this nasty illness. I think and pray for you every day. I hope the clinic will have some free treatments for you. Hugs, Mary

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you Mary, all I can do is fight, the rest is up to the doctors and the Big Guy. The docs can bring remission, He can bring a cure, otherwise I don't like option #3.

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by manami 15 Dec 2011

Dear Debra,
You are always in my thoughts, and I'm so glad to hear you are a fighter. I pray God give you strengh and protect you to go all through this. You have a great family here praying for you. A big hug for you my friend.
Love and blessings, Yoriko

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you Yoriko, you are such a dear. A big hug for you too my friend!

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by lidiad 15 Dec 2011

Sorry about the news but I'm relieved to know that you are a fighter. You are too young to go, there are so many people praying and supporting you. Thank you for letting us know the developments. Miracles happen and we all pray for you! HUGS, Lidia

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you Linda, I need a miracle now. And cyber hugs help a lot too!

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by ansalu 15 Dec 2011

Just stood up and read your post. Good news look a little bit different :o( You know that we will go along with you and support you as much as we can with prayers (you know not my speciality ;o) positive thoughts and so much love through the cyber space that all the wires will glow :o)
Big Hugs to you my dear
Bettina

2 comments
muflotex by muflotex 15 Dec 2011

bettina put it in right words - the wires and wireless will send gooooood vibrations your way - so go kickem
xox Sue

leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Bettina my friend, I know you only wish the best for me and I'll take it any way I can get it! I thought my computer wires felt a bit warm this morning, lol. I will fight, I have to because there is only one alternative and I don't like that one! Not ready to go yet!

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by rw9340 15 Dec 2011

Sorry to hear that the news is not good. Glad to know you are a fighter. The good lord with be on your side and looking down on your. I will keep you in my prayers.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, I need all I can get.

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by raels011 15 Dec 2011

Sorry to hear your results but am happy you have such a positive outlook and I know you will fight like mad
Hugs Raelene

2 comments
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you! There isn't too much that can get me down! I've had head colds worse than this! I'm gonna fight a good fight and I won't "fight like a girl" as the new saying goes, lol.

bowlds by bowlds 15 Dec 2011

Now that's funny Debra!

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by airyfairy 15 Dec 2011

Dear Debra - we are leaving for Johannesburg any minute now but I just had to answer this. It was so sad reading your post but thank you for telling us all what is going on. I think about you so much and may you have the strength to fight this horrible thing. Lots of love coming over the seas for you. Hugs Sarah

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Oh Sarah, thank you! I am going to fight with all I have, I have too many people who need me here! You have a nice trip and hug those little ones every chance you get. I wished for grands but it doesn't look like there will be any so I will just love my grandkitties, I have 4 and my son's girlfriend has 2 so I guess those are my step-grandkitties!

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by bumblebee 15 Dec 2011

More than one opinion is good. My aunt was diagnosed
terminal and incurable 2 years ago. She fought it-she said if its God will I accept but I want to live and I will do my part and fight!
She is still here and cancer is gone.
We are not promised tommorow but while here live, occupy and make a difference. We are here for support and prayers.
Hugs
Linda aka Bumblebee

2 comments
bumblebee by bumblebee 15 Dec 2011

How could I forget, my father is in a nursing home and 2 mos ago my sister called and said he was in ICU and would not be waking up. He wanted to live too and he made it and is still here with us.
It seems like the will to live, along with
treatment and support really help.
MOre hugs,
Linda

leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Bless her heart, I agree with her totally! I just don't feel like it is my time yet so I will fight and continue to live, I am not ready to sit in a chair and wait to die, too many people give up and I am not one of them!

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by crafter2243 Moderator 15 Dec 2011

Debra first a huge hug even though it is only a cyber one. I am sorry to hear that the results are not what we all had hoped for. Through your posts I can tell that you will fight this with all that you can and I pray that God will give you the strength to do so. Stay strong girl. A lot of us are lifting you up in prayer. Hugs Angie

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, cyber hugs are better, they make me smile, real hugs make me cry and I don't want to waste time crying. My parents need me and my hubby needs me and my sons are not ready to lose me so I think I will stick around a while, lol!

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by beatie58 15 Dec 2011

Sorry your news is not better, but so love your extremely positive attudite to all of this, you are in my thoughts daily. Hugs sally

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, I know I was hoping for better news but didn't expect it would be, I could feel my body hurting in ways I never felt before so I knew I was in for this battle and I plan to win it!

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by keeponsewing 15 Dec 2011

Deb, sorry to hear that the outcome wasn't what you were expecting, but I know you are a fighter... We have a song in church that we sing that goes like this:(substituting the we for you) God said you're gonna make it, God said you're gonna make it, God said you're gonna make it, you're gonna make it through the raging storm. Don't worry about the thunder, you're not going under. God said you're gonna make it, you're gonna make it cause the Master's on board." Aren't you glad you have a higher power that knows all? He has created you to be a fighter. Keeping you in prayer. Hugs, Terre

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

I have to believe that this isn't the only plan for me on earth, there has to be something more if only to show others that cancer can be fought and you need a positive outlook before you can take it on.

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by justonlyme 15 Dec 2011

I sure dislike the horrible beast called "Cancer". I'm very pleased to see that you are in a fighting spirit and not admitting defeat! I have a very good friend who is also fighting a similar battle. She has been fighting for more than a decade, which is about, well, almost a decade longer than the doctor gave her. She set her mind to it, went on a "super foods" diet (everything healthy, no junk), and has been exercising as much as possible.
I wish you the very best. I hope you get a doctor who has a bright outlook and is forward thinking enough to get you through this to a point of great health! Please keep us updated with your progress! And take care of YOU! If never before, now is the time!!

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, I hate cancer too, remember back in the day when people only "whispered the C word", so afraid to even speak its name and now it seems to touch every family in some way. I will fight with all I have.

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by bnilla9241 14 Dec 2011

I can't say I understand about your illness. I want to tell you that I will again place you on our prayer list at Church. Cleavland Clinic, as I have been told, gives the best healthcare and support of any place around. A church member, Jenise Huffman) will be at the CC on February 17th. She is 33, and her outlook has improved since going there.
Miracles do happen. I offer prayer and comfort and all the hugs I can squeeze through the computer.
Cutie love,
Bonnie

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

My insurance is only covering 2 visits to Cleveland Clinic for now so I need to see if they have anything free trials they are doing or experimenting with. I'll do what I gotta do!

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by greysewist Moderator 14 Dec 2011

A great pity the news isn't better, but you're finding the strength to be tough, so keep up the good work. Seems you're the one who's going to need to be. Fingers crossed for some great options from Cleveland.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you! I have met so many wonderful women on this site and am thankful I have all of you to lean on.

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by obaachan 14 Dec 2011

That clinic is a GREAT place ! NEVER GIVE UP .... FIGHT ALL THE WAY !\
Thinking of you everyday and fighting for you too !
Jo

2 comments
obaachan by obaachan 14 Dec 2011

Another GREAT place is the Cancer Treatment Center in OK...

leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

The Cancer Treatment center in PA is closer but I don't know if my insurance would cover it, right now they are only covering 2 visits to Cleveland Clinic so we shall see where I go from here.

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by capoodle 14 Dec 2011

Will be praying that the Cleveland Clinic has lots of Hope for your treatment. Stay Tough.

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you, planning to fight all the way!

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by pennifold 14 Dec 2011

Dearest Debra,

So sad to see that the results were not what you were wanting to get, but as you say - you haven't given up. Positivity plays a big part in your journey. I'm so glad to have gotten to know you on here and am in awe of your determination. As you said 57 is too young and I pray that the Cleveland centre will help with everything they have. Know that I'm thinking of you across the other side of the world. I also pray that your pain will ease. Love and blessings Chris

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you Chris, I am going to fight and do what I feel is best for me. I don't think God is ready for me yet and I have angels in Heaven watching over me, especially an uncle I adore and miss so much but he has been gone from us for 37 years, he was married to my hubby's sister but hubby and I didn't meet until after my uncle passed and I know he would be happy about our marriage so I know he is watching along side 2 sets of grands, my great grandma who I miss so much though she died when I was in 3rd grade and I have other aunts and uncles up there watching. I'll be OK!

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by olly 14 Dec 2011

Oh Deb, I am so sorry to hear that you have a battle ahead of you. However battles can be won. You have incredible determination and fight in you. I am hoping that your parents gain strength to cope. As parents though we can understand how they are feeling for their child. I am glad that you have no intention of giving up. You go girl!!

I also know how you feel about your husband who relies on you for everything. However, let him learn to cope while you use your strength to walk the long road ahead. We are praying for you and you have many friends here who are holding your hand every step of the way. God bless you. Coral

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 15 Dec 2011

Thank you Coral, I am determined to fight, I saw my sister-in-law go to chemo and radiation and not fight, she sat in her chair and watched TV all day long. Not me man, I want to live!

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by anangel 14 Dec 2011

Bravo, keep up the positive spirit! You fight this as long as you have strength to do so, and then keep on trying. No one knows, but the Lord what lies in store, and I believe in His miracles.
Hang in there; know we are praying for a remission and for you to have many better days to come!! Cleveland Clinic has a good reputation, so hopefully, you will find the help you need there!
Hugs,
Angel

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 14 Dec 2011

Thanks, I plan to fight long and hard to stay around, my hubby wouldn't know what to do without me and my parents are falling apart over this! I have angels around me and family in Heaven watching over me!

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by drro 14 Dec 2011

I am praying for you to have the strength for the physical and spiritual, emotional and medical journeys you are taking! God is the great defender and He will hold your hand all the way on these paths! God bless you for your bravery and determination to surmount this new and difficult challenge. But, with God , All things are possible! HUGS and BLESSINGS across the electronic waves from me to you!!

2 comments
drro by drro 14 Dec 2011

and...Thank you for been so courageous to correspond with us here!

leenova54 by leenova54 14 Dec 2011

Thank you so much! I plan to fight with all I have and if God isn't ready for me then I will be here as long as possible, my parents are still alive and no parent should have to bury their child, even if she is 57! He better have some good plans for me while I'm here. If nothing else to show others that you can fight it and not sit back and wait to die!

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by bowlds 14 Dec 2011

I'm sorry the news was not what we all hoped. I have heard good things about the Cleveland Clinic so maybe they will have more tricks in their bag. Don't say no to a treatment they think will help just because it's not close to home, remember my 220 mile story! I hope you are managing your pain while you wait for treatment.
Best wishes Debra, you are often on my mind.
Cathy

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 14 Dec 2011

Thank you, if they have something really good to offer I am sure hubby will say we are doing it. He is hurting but doesn't show it and I am too young to give up and die, I am only 57....and 2/3, lol.

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by sewbadly 14 Dec 2011

Love your attitude.
Hate the news.

Sorry about your pain... everywhere.
Take care.
julie

1 comment
leenova54 by leenova54 14 Dec 2011

Thank you, I am tough and plan to fight!

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