We have had the Service Dog for our son Ben, now for one month, and her training is coming along pretty well. We are going to keep her. But, all you dog lovers forgot to tell me something very important. She has bonded to me! She calls me MOM. She follows me everywhere and she is jealous of the cats and birds. She likes Ben, and he likes her, but she thinks she is my dog. Ben feeds her, and I take his hand to have him pet her, and tell him how to talk to her. But those big brown eyes look at me with unconditional love. I didn't need a dog - I have cats! They don't worship me like she does! Now what do I do???

Mac, our African Grey parrot, was out of his cage and flew right over Bia and she didn't chase after him! That was another of our worries that isn't a worry anymore! Things are looking good for keeping Bia! Here she is, and 2nd with Ben, you can see Mac on the left behind and Jane behind them too!

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

Do you see what I mean about those brown eyes?

My girlfriend has a guide dog and when she is off leash Feather can go and do whatever or whomever she wants. On leash she has to be attentive to my girlfriend and no one is allowed to pet or distract her when she is working unless they ask. Everyone has good advise so would ask the trainer what would be best.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

Thanks, It's neat to know that Feather can tell the difference between working time, and non-working times!

What a wonderful problem to have...

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

It is nice that someone, even if it is a dog, thinks i'm so wonderful!

Meganne has given you good advise! She's a pro! I had to laugh at your last comment about the cats! But you're right!

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

I keep reminding Bia that cats rule and dogs drool :-)

It was a natural occurence because of your true love of animals and she instinctfully picked up on that.....Meganne has said it all.....good luck, my friend....it will be difficult for you as I know you love her back and want to be there for her like your other animals....tough situation!!

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

The cats have decided she is a curiosity. They swat at her, but they also lie on their backs as she runs by. I found Snap sleeping on one end of the old couch and Bia asleep on the other end. I think we've made it over that hurdle at least.

Jan, you cannot "undo" true love!! LOL I agree with Meganne, that Ben should always be the one the dog goes to for feeding and treats. But, I, also, understand it is not an easy task to get our "special" kids to give the needed attention to entice the love and affection from lovable critters for bonding (without our physical assistance). Therefore, the dog possibly sees you and Ben as a "unit"! He is following the unit half that is giving out more "pats and rubs" regularly. As Meg said, just gently encourage his attention towards Ben.
Hugs,
Angel

P.S.: I CAN understand the dog "worshiping" YOU!! LOL
P.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

I had forgotten those big brown eyes and the affect they have on humans! With Bates, Ben's first service dog, they had time together without me as Ben was still in school. With Bia, it is going to be different. Dogs ARE different than cats.

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

You're right too, Ben doesn't naturally give affection. I have to teach him to pat an rub her, even to say her name often. We have made up a little song with her name in it, he sings to her. Bee-ah is an easy name for him to say :-)

Enjoy every moment. Sometimes I get tears in my eyes when my pekinese looks at me and then jumps on my knee. Your dog will learn that it is Ben that she has to look after. Hugs Sarah.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

She is extra gentle with Ben. And she does sleep with him, at least the first two hours of the night. Then he gets up and when he goes back to bed he closes the door with her on the wrong side. I'm thinking of fixing the door so she can still get back in :-)

Wow., firstly may I say how lovely for you to have such a faithful little friend.
However., as to what to do.....Meganne has gone to sooo much trouble for you., all makes such good sense... isn't that lovely of her.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

I really do appreciate the help! We are using a dog trainer, to train me to train her, but we can use all the help we can get!

When a dog loves a certain person, that shows there is love in its heart, which is a good thing. You don't have to try and change it just encourage Ben to do more for her, especially the feeding, he should always be the one to feed her.
Give him some little liver treats to keep in his pocket (not too many just a few each day) so he can reward her with one just whenever he wants to and make sure nobody else in the house does this. This must be something really special between Ben & her.

When you talk to her, when Ben is not in the same room, like before he gets out of bed, or if he goes into another room, ask her in a really excited voice, "Where's Ben? and keep repeating it along with her name "Where's Ben, Bonny/Sally whatever???" and every time he comes into the room or back into the room, use the same excited tone and say, "Here's Ben" and let Ben give her a liver treat. You need to be genuinely excited to see Ben and make sure it really shows so that she also gets excited, plus there is the (SMALL) liver treat from Ben every time she runs over to him.
If possible, get Ben to really acknowledge her each time she runs to him.
In time she will love Ben equally.

When I inherited my second husband's 2 year old dog, the instant we met, she became mine and on the 5 hour drive home she laid down on the passenger seat and her head never left my lap the whole trip. So when I moved in with Ray a couple of years later I really wanted my animals to love him and respond to him so that he would accept them more easily.

It took work because Ray had never had animals so it meant training him too. Now Lady divides her time equally between us when Ray is home, and when he comes home from work she gets so excited she runs around the house looking for a toy to give gim.
And Tidge (my oldest cat) will lay on him as often as the opportunity arrives.

Since she has decided you are her pack leader it will now all be in how you show the dog you want her to be with Ben. And if for no other reason she will do it to please you and as she grows older she will understand that Ben is special and will be drawn to him in a special way. You will also need to keep your petting of her to the barest minimum, while you are teaching her that she is there for Ben.

My history with animals, breeding, training, showing many different breeds of dogs, horses and cats, started when I was a child, I love animals.
Hugs and roses, Meganne

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by momhome 11 Apr 2012

Meganne - what wonderful advice. It is nice to have so many talented people who we can turn to for all kinds of advice. I know it wasn't my question, but I want to say thank-you also.

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

You are so right, Meganne. I do need to do more with getting excited when Ben comes into the room. He'll love that too. I have a bowl of treats that Ben can reach, but Bia can't and I encourage him to give them to her. He is really restricted in what he can do with his hands, like he can't reach into a pocket. I'll place more treat bowls around so he can get to them more often.

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

what he can do with his hands, like he can't reach into a pocket. I'll place more treat bowls around so he can get to them more often. The way to her heart is definitely through her tummy. He does do the feeding, and treat giving, except when I'm out with her doing direct training. Ben can't handle stern voices, they upset him and then he screams. So, I have to do anything that takes even a firm voice, out of earshot of Ben.

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

out with her doing direct training. Ben can't handle stern voices, they upset him and then he screams. He just doesn't interpret voices right - any firm or stern voice is threatening to him. So, I have to do anything that takes even a firm voice,

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

out of earshot of Ben. So, I take Bia out to work with her, then when she's all warmed up and doing well, we go get Ben and he has a positive experience working with her. We have made great progress in one month, but of course there is much more to learn!

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

learn. She's already 4-5 years old, and although she's pretty wonderful, she is a bit stubborn about lying down and staying down. Any suggestions on that?

You are in a very tough position. The dog of the house needs to be Bens... are you up for another dog? Will she fits his needs? Wish I could help.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

No more dogs or fish or anything else! We have three cats and two parrots! Just adding one more animal was quite a feat! It truly feels like a zoo around here :-)

Like Sue said, just love her back. My daughter in law had that happen twice. She got a dog and it loved my son and the third time she got one for herself she wouldn't let anyone make of her so she had a dog of her own. It sort of worked (-:

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

I think they just kind of know.... Who is in your avitar??

It sometimes works out like that. My first dog I had was totally mu husband's dog. I fed her, I walked her I went to the vet with her I was home most of the time while he worked but the moment he came home I did not count. Risky, my new dog is my dog. I do not do anything different but she has chosen me to follow love and adore. Just enjoy it!

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

It is a treat to have a friend who loves me unconditionally...

Love her back!

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

That's the easy part. It's just amazing to me, how easy it is for her to love. She was found abandoned, starving, having given birth to puppies. They couldn't find any puppies though, so she suffered quite a loss. She's going to have a great ending to her story, though!

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

ending to her story. From being a rescue to becoming a very special service dog! I need to post a photo, don't I?

I HAVE BREED DOGS FOR YEARS NOT SAYING I KNOW EVERTHING BUT TRY EMBILCORDING HER TO BEN..SHE CANT FOLLOW YOU AROUND.HE DOES EVERTHING FOR HER .ASK THE SERVICE DOG PEOPLE BUT I TOLD ALL MY CLINETS TO LEASH THE DOG TIE HER TO BEN.I BELIVE YOU SHOULDENT DO ANYTHING FOR HER WHILE SHE IS WORKING..UNLESS BEN CANT DO SOMETHING..GOOD LUCK LUCY

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

Hi Lucy, Ben has a very bad spine. He broke his back two years ago and has a hard time walking. He falls easily, so I can't tie the dog to him. It helps him to hold on to her to walk. She walks slowly beside him, and he has a nice thick handle to hold. He can't use his hands very well. She helps him a lot!

by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

She somehow knows to walk slowly with him!

Love it back. If you don't want it I will have it as I lost my 14 year old in Feb and it gets a little lonely, but I am also enjoying the freedom.

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by hightechgrammy 11 Apr 2012

I'm so sorry you lost your dog: 14 years is a long time to love an animals and then lose it. Ben had a service dog before, Bates, who only lived 12 years. It took us 4 years to consider getting another dog. It's hard, isn't it?