Just a funny poem I wrote, for all you cat lovers out there who have ever tried to decorate for Christmas. I hope you enjoy it, and that you all have very happy holidays with your families and friends!!!
The Crazy Cat Lady Tries for a Very Martha Stewart Christmas
By Marji Alexa Weber
‘Twas the night before Christmas
And all thru the house
The kitties were sleeping
And dreaming of mouse,
Or turkey and gravy
Or stuff from a can;
Mike dreams of cow barns,
Warm milk in a pan.
The tree’s all a-sparkle,
And so is the floor,
Sweet Lucy-furr’s napping
And waiting for more!
There’s balls under tables
Under chairs and the bed;
Thank God for plastic,
Or Lucy’d be dead.
She snorfels the trunk
And sharpens her claws,
I hang balls, she bats them
With nary a pause.
At least it’s still upright,
My poor little tree,
De-balled and de-tinseled
By Lucy for me!
There’s been a small train wreck—
Inky played with the switch;
The caboose has gone missing,
The engine’s in a ditch.
The artistic gift-wrapping
That took me so long—
With hand-made paper, perfect bows,
All done to Christmas songs—
Is just a bit messy
With fang marks and spit,
Ribbons are dangling,
And the tags? Well, oh, shoot!
And the dried-flower nosegays
All golden and glitter,
Fuzz-butts thought it was color-
Coordinate litter!
Spot’s asleep in the manger
‘Cause I used real hay;
Martha Stewart, you’re CATLESS,
We can’t do it this way!!!
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5290I think Martha has cats ,too. I love your poem. My KiKi does not play with cat toys or bother things in the house. She was well trained by her first owner. She lived in the wild and in the bushes for a year before I finally got her inside. She has come a long way in 4 yrs., but still has to go outside each day to be happy. Kay
85867567Love the poem. You should publish it. I can just picture it. Our cats were shut up away from the tree and presents. Hope you had a very Merry Christmas with your family and extended family of cats.
13250Thanks for sharing your kitty world. My kitty and her cousin kitty are visiting at our house but the cousin is in another room, as they are 'getting on each other's nerves'.
70914I'm bringing this back up so all my "cat lover" friends don't miss it, I know how busy everyone can be over Christmas holidays. I hope you all had good times, shared with family and friends. Hugs, Marji
33451Our 2ft tall tree hasn't made it out of its box this year.No way would I trust Gandalf with all those small balls, he would have the time of his life getting all the decorations down to play with during the night & when he'd finished jaws (our dog Cherrie) would chew them up probably needing a trip to the vet.Gandalf recently got up onto the kitchen ,pulled out a raw pork chop bone which was in a bag of rubbish & gave it to Cherrie who decided it would be a good idea to eat it on the loungeroom carpet.
The rule is not to leave any food unattended on the kitchen benches but husband forgets this.
25212My Tigger is the best behaved cat on the planet. He walks under the tree to get to the window but pays no attention to the ornaments or the gifts that are under the tree. But my son had a cat that would race across the room and jump into the tree and send everything flying. They finally had to put the tree in a corner and anchor it to the wall.
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360641thanks for the lovely poem! and great Christmas tree you are having ! SMILE
148884Marji that is a cute and funny poem. Wishing you and your 4 legged friends a wonderful Christmas.
109774This is beautiful and great for cat lovers throughout the world. Happy Christmas to you and your cats. Tuppance my cat is now doing her bit for Christmas and attacking the tree
115744Have a wonderful Christmas and thank you for the laughs! Suzanne
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743281That is hilarious! I hope you still have a wonderful day tomorrow with all your furry friends. Love Chris
234491absolutely adorable. How clever you are. Being mom to 5 kitties I've learned long ago what you are and are not allowed to have. Lots of hairballs for presents but for me no tree......;-)
17161Really cute!!! I had to put this plus photo on my nieces facebook page!! Happy Holidays
45070Lovely poem! Our dog isn't interested in the tree, but she loves parcels!
140717lol. You are so creative. Knew someone that sprayed cayenne pepper on their tree to keep the cats away. The year before they had destroyed it. Have A Very Merry Christmas!!!
89895This is so funny! Loved it. Brings back memories when our cat was alive. The tree was decorated down to where he could reach and did not have tinsel. Thank goodness he didn't climb it.
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