1/1/2013 I wish when someone is being corrected about rules of this site it be a PM to the one offending and a second generic posting for a reminder to the members.

I have scores of unanswered PMs, too. I'm sure if people ignore their private messages here, they would also ignore an e-mail. Also, there is no way to tell if an e-mail you've sent has been read unless the person responds. If they don't read private messages, why would they respond to an e-mail? And where would we get these e-mail addresses, exactly? That would take an awful lot of time to look up and to send, with very little hope of a reply. Please understand that the moderators are volunteers, this is not a paid full time job for us.

What I really wish is that if someone is reminded politely of a rule of the site, or simply given information about where it would be better to place something, or simply asked to refrain from doing something, people would not take it as some sort of personal attack, but as the point of information it is, and just move on and not argue about it. The moderators are not here to slap anyone down, simply to remind people of rules of the site, and rules of good behaviour. If we as moderators make a comment of that type in a post, the expected response is "Oh, ok, sorry I didn't know that." And that should be the end of the story. There seems to be a perception among some people that they are being picked on, put down, criticized unfairly, etc. etc. and that's not meant to be the case. We are simply giving information in the easiest, quickest fashion that works. And giving that information in the post that causes the difficulty may educate others and prevent them from making the same mistake. The goal of this forum has always been to establish and maintain a caring community of embroiderers, and that hasn't changed. Moderators are not here to attack anyone, or make anyone feel bad, just to keep order and keep the rules. We do that the best we can in the time each of us have to spend here, while actually living our real lives as well. It's unrealistic to expect moderators to spend 8 or 10 hours a day here reading and responding by e-mail to everyone individually, when there are hundreds of posts and comments a day in the community. We are doing the best we can, as I'm sure all of the Cuties are in their various ways. It would be far simpler to just delete posts that are in any way mistaken or troublesome, but then how would any one learn? How would anyone know why a post was deleted? It's not a perfect world. It would be a lot more helpful if people would realize they were being given information out of a desire to be helpful to them and to the others on the forum, and not see everything as a personal attack, which it never is. I hope this has been some help in explaining things, hugs, Marji

I'm afraid that it probably wouldn't work. I also have lots of unanswered PM's. Email would be my preference.

I agree, however, there are scores of unread, unanswered PM's in my inbox. We can't be assured that they go back and read the post either, so should we do a direct email?

2 comments

by anangel 03 Jan 2013

I think a direct email in a polite informative manner would be a better choice of communication. My three grown daughters have told me they appreciated that, as they were children, I never scolded or disciplined them in front of each other. I took the offending party to a private area for reprimanding and/or punishment. Works great for children, and even better for ADULTS.
Hugs, Angel

by sandyqueen 03 Jan 2013

Thanks to all who commented and gave stars. Perhaps the moderators could work together to make make bad new more pleasant,

S