Can I gripe? I help take care of a 56 year old man who is diabetic. He's that way because he survived pancreatic cancer by having his pancreas removed - totally removed! So this pencil thin man is not "just diabetic" - he is extremely diabetic and has to watch and measure every single item that goes into his mouth. AND his family is always after him for not taking better care of himself....... grrrrrrrrrr rant grrrrrrrrrr

Grip away my love and let it all out. I am just amazed that you didn.t say somthing at the party in front of everyone as to how thoughtless the whole darn lot of them are. I tell you know that had it have been me there then they would have heard me tell them a thing or two and i would not have held back iether. Bless you for caring ..

They seem to be very selfcentred. I have a very diabetic husband and always try to do the right thing for him. It is not always easy. I think they need literature on the subject so they can understand what diabetes is and how to care for a diabetic person. I feel really sorry for this friend of yours. God bless both of you.

Someone needs to get some DM education, and it is not you Hightechgrammy! And they could also use some of your "CARING" skills. Hugs, Suzanna

Of course you can gripe! I don't know how you can get through to people who never think of others.

shame on them. Esp knowing there is history of diabetes within the family. My dog was diagnosed with it about a year ago. Shots twice a day now. I worry constantly about her... whats wrong with his family!!?

I understand how u feel my husband is diabetic with an insulin pump and he has trouble with going out to places too Lots of people don't understand how it is till they have to deal with it daily . That family sounds like they aren't very caring .

This is very interesting reading. I have to say that the many places where I go to in the UK there is usually a choice. If eating out menus are labelled to vege and none vege and most places happily accommodate dietary requirements. My daughter went out recently for a birthday celebration and one of the group has recently been diagnosed with coeliac. She asked what was suitable and had a great evening along with her friends. If people are eating at someones home they say I am xxx or I cant eat xxx and people provide accordingly. Diabetes is on the increase. Others will then say a party is a party and stuff the diet...

Some people just don't "think".
I have food problems and another lady with different food problems to me told me once that she has found that on the days we meet (at a third person's house with lots of different people on the food supply roster) if she takes some food to eat with her, then the food that is available for all is suitable for her to eat.
I took notice after that -- AND -- she was oh so correct!
If I take something I can eat, then there is plenty for me to eat. BUT on the days that I am rushed and don't take anything, then I go without food all day or eat something that will make me sick. What a choice!
And I am just as guilty. For my wedding over 30 years ago, one of the guests was on a restricted diet. My husband & I did the catering, but when I offered food to this guest, I suddenly realised that not one piece of it was suitable for him to eat.
Worst of all he was one of my witnesses, so I knew him well.
I apologised profusely.
Trouble is, I have done it to him a few times over the years since then. The last time, he just brought out a little bag of goodies. But I still felt red-faced. That time was so silly. I had planned to go to the shops, but they were all closed. I have been very careful of Christmas days shopping since then.
Just make yourself a nice little goodies bag for such occasions and if you don't need it - good. If you do, then at least you don't starve.

Some people do not want to learn they go about blinkered, I am very surprised he has not got neuropathy of the feet and is in a wheel chair like my sister.
Hugs Pam.

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by hightechgrammy 09 Jul 2014

He does have neuropathy of his feet, and they swell terribly. He has been hospitalized several times.... It's hard dealing with diabetes. It's really hard trying to help someone else control theirs.

Yes, I can see why you are very cross. My mother in law has serious coeliac disease and often cannot eat a thing others prepare.

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by hightechgrammy 09 Jul 2014

My dad has really learned how to just not eat with his celiac disease. But by now, our family is very careful to always bring something for Dad, even if it is Rice Krispie Treats.

The family gets together for my Uncles birthday every year (he is 92) and they always have diabetic stuff their, candy, cake, munchies, and other foods--diabetic chocolate really isn't that bad.

Yes, and the education of newly diagnosed diabetics is also to blame. Diet and exercise walk hand in hand here with a fine balancing act. The heart diet isn't the one to follow either, it's better than nothing...but the old time diets of measuring and balancing carbs, protein etc is the only real way to manage. Just a suggestion. Take a cooler of the foods you can eat, on ice with you and if necessary your are covered. If someone gets offended just tell them it's cheaper than a hospital stay and you didn't want to put them out as they may have forgotten you had different needs.

Grrrr, Grrrah. Where is the common sense?

.....and a big Grrrrrr from me, too!

I see this all too often. I believe that a lot of people feel, if it is not their problem, they do not understand the gravidity of the situation. As for diabetes. There are a lot of out of control diabetics around. Wish I had answers. God bless you for caring so much about this person.

Hugs
Doreen

I think the motive is pure & simple...plain ole not even thinking. Sad.

Even if it was the "in-laws" that provided the food - I would think there would be plenty of people there that realized his condition and would have had food for him!! His health sounds so precarious - the food situation was quite shocking!! Hugs to you both! Laura*

I got to thinking and realized it wasn't actually his dad's family who had hosted this party... it was "the inlaws." They were the ones who had furnished all the foods. They were the culprits here. His dad and sister had come from out of town...... So they found themselves in the same predicament that my friend did. Hmmmm the plot thickens! Nice gesture.... but what is the motive here.....???

Vent away. It is good for us all to be reminded to think of the needs of others. I am not a vegetarian but I do love fruits and veggies. And I don't need a lot of sweets with my weight. But most get-togethers have desserts and more desserts. And that is why I love to bring a salad.

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

The fruits are wonderful, but unfortunately most of them have way too much sugar in them for diabetics. The veggies in salads are much lower in carbs, so having lots of salad choices, without dressings, is ideal. Also, although they are more expensive, meat and cheese trays have so little carbs, people with diabetes can really enjoy themselves. And really, so can most people who are watching their weight.

YES, YES,YES. As a nurse, I know how very dangerous this situation was. Teach him to always take a little snack with him . Make some up and bag them for him to take along when he goes away from home. This entire family is playing with dynamite. He is so fortunate to have you and to have you go to the party. Diabetics that eat what they want thinking to themselves" I'll take an extra amt. of insulin" are playing Russian Roulette with their lives/Lillian

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

Lillian, he does really like those little Lunchables snacks that are prepackaged cheese/ham and cracker kits. I wonder if they make them other places besides the US. They sell them near the deli here.

Clearly, with his family, this man needed to take an emergency kit- a little cheese and cracker pack, a handful of almonds or something to cover his food needs in case they didn't.

I was in charge of the food for our choir and orchestra of about 170 one year and I tried to be sure there were things the diabetics could eat. That's when I found out there were many, many in the group and they were so appreciative it wasn't just cake and cookies and candy!

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

I bet they did! And I always appreciate it when bottled water is available - or diet pop even. You'd be amazed how often people furnish only sugary soda or sweetened tea only. Most people these days just don't want all that sugar anyway. I wonder if that is world-wide or just US...

Yes, it is sooo exasperating, when people do not cooperate or are in denial about these things...glad you have come over to the light side (star wars reference, lol)

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

May the food Force be with us :-)

You certainly can.. Gipe Away, It really suprises me that people and sometimes whole families really don't have a clue and are happy to be that way. but watch when one of them loses a limb or has a stroke they will be the ones complaining that there is nothing there that they can eat and not be as patient as your friend..

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

Some people are just clueless. I think this was actually the inlaws fault this time.....

I think that people don't understand, or are in denial, or don't even think about the health of their family members...or a combination of all three. My sister in law was in kidney failure for years, and so every get-together took incredible planning to be sure that she could have food that didn't contain phosphorus, potassium and a whole host of other things. It wasn't easy, but we did it. Maybe someone needs to educate this family? I agree with you on so many levels!!!!

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

I agree. I think it is a combination. They think birthday party and they just think sugar.

YES! Jan, I hear what you are saying. I think it's the same here, every time you go out to a function there are far too many sweet things. I take a nice fruit platter and some gluten free crackers so that anyone can have something. Hope you are doing o.k. Love Chris

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by hightechgrammy 08 Jul 2014

I'm glad you mentioned Gluten too, Chris. Lots of people here, anyway, are finding out they can't have gluten. My dad has celiac disease. Sometimes he can't find anything at pot lucks, and he has his own cache of GF treats at all times. He can eat almost all fruits and veggies and he has such a nice, trim body!