This is such as difficult decision and time to live through. I Can't imagine what you are feeling. I pray that help comes your way and that you remain healthy as well so take care of yourself also,
hugs
Michellle

I know your sweet heart Miss Lillian and so does Ron. No one has any idea the struggle that you are going through, at least here on earth. I am praying that you will be led to do not only what is best for Ron, but for you also. I'm also praying for peace of mind at whatever decision you and your family reach. How blessed you are to have family that is able to help you. Love and prayers, Jerrilyn.

You are facing one of the most difficult decisions of your life and no matter what , it won't be easy. I pray you have a strong support system to help you through this.

Lillian, that is one of the hardest decisions we have to make. I pray you will be at peace when the time comes. My daughter works at a nursery home as a speech path. She says the family that visits often & at different times seem to see the best care for their loved ones. When/if the time comes, I know you & your family will be there often. I know you will. Will be praying for strength for you - both physically & emotionally. Hugs.

I know this is tough all the way around. If he does go into home now, you can arrive at his side fresh early in the day and stay till you are tired, then go home to rest and know that he is being taken care of, check in by phone in the evening.

The people who do not fare well in nursing homes are those who do not have someone checking on them regularly and at unexpected times - the staff might let that shave or bath slip a day or forget to check dressings, etc. because they know no one is watching. Correct any problems you see swiftly so they know you are his diligent protector and advocate!

It is nice to have SILs that are willing and able to help, but I realise it can't be sufficient. I so hope and pray you'll get enough home care for you and Ron having to make that awful decision for a long, long time! Hugs, Martine

dear lillian, I hope and pray for you there are a lot of sweet friends and familymembers who are willing and able to help you as long as it is possible . Hugs Gerry

Such a difficult time and I pray that you will get the support you need to help you both...

I am thinking of you both so much dear Lillian. Hugs Sarah

All the best to you and your dear family. I know what you are going through and pray that all will work out to the best, even so, only you know what will be best for your situation in the future. All my prayers are for you.

Lillian, I am praying for you and your husband to get the help needed to take the stress off you, as well as the care he needs. Being a caretaker takes a tremendous toll, and you have to strive to keep yourself healthy as possible. That may involve making decisions you do not want to, for his sake, as well as yours.
Recently, my 86 year old cousin, who has been disabled for 45 years with MS, Parkinson, and glaucoma, lost his wife, age 82, to pneumonia. She had chosen to care for him completely by herself all these years, as they had no children. As well, she procrastinated about getting home health care for assistance. She did hire someone to stay for a few hours a couple of days a week, so she could run errands, get groceries, etc. She was so proud she could still do all the chores, the yard work, as well as care for him, and as she developed a few minor health problems, she still wanted to keep trying to do it ALL! When she was in ICU with pneumonia, she told me to please remember how she waited too long, and to not let this happen to me in the years ahead. Such a dear lady, and I miss her so much.
I am only telling you this trying to help. My heart goes out to you in this difficult situation.
My love and hugs,
Angel

Miss Lillian, I'm sure this weighs heavy on your heart. Know that the choice is up to you; but if something happens to bring your health down to where you are unable to care for him, this takes the choice of care out of your hands. It might be better to consider the care/nursing facilities now while you still have the options and abilities to do so. Some facilities also accommodate married couples or maybe an assisted living facility would work where you can still both be together and have help with his daily care as needed. It isn't giving up or a crime to ask for help, I look at it as a person who has done all they are able to do and when push comes to shove...going that extra mile to ensure the best for everyone involved. God Bless you and will be praying for everyone involved. hugs for you

Prayers are with you both! Suzanne

You have my sympathy, Lillian. The doctors would like my mother to place my dad in a care facility. One doc is concerned as much for her health as for his. She does have home care available for several hours throughout the day but none at night. His needs are becoming too much. I'm sure you are experiencing much the same.

Dear Miss Lillian. I know all too well the struggle you are going through and I pray that the Home Health Care will be able to be offer enough, It is so hard to admit that the health and strength just isn't enough anymore to care for the person we love. I pray that God may give you the wisdom and strength needed in this difficult decision. Big hug coming your way.

Lillian, you are not complaining - you are simply telling us and I am happy you did. You are doing exactly what I believe I would do. Getting some extra help will be so good for you. When the time comes for you to make that decision - you will know, you will know! Meanwhile, I am praying for you, your dear Ron and for the health care helpers - Loads of love and prayers, Laura*

Bless you heart. Best wishes to you both that you can stay together always.

I do hope and pray you get the help you need. Thinking of you both.

I know these can be difficult times. I pray you get the help you need. Hugs Shirley

My heart goes out to you, Lillian. You and Ron are in my prayers. Hugs, Joyce

What a perfect helpmate you have been and continue to be in whatever capacity you are able. Your love shines through your words and no one reads them as a complaint. They are words of a caring and loving person who only asks for prayers. Thank you for sharing and giving us all an opportunity to pray for you and your family especially during this difficult time.

Love is expressed here not complaining. Lord knows this and my heart is touched thinking of how over years with someone how it seems like only yesterday we said I do. I will be asking Lord to provide with his favor for you a way that you can have your hubby with you. Hugs Mary

Oh Lillian this is such sad news for both of you.:(:(May ole heart hurts for you both .Will Pray hugs always Carolyn

My Dear Miss Lillian, I know what you are going through as we also had begun to look at Nursing Homes for my Dad, Ron (unfortunately he died before he got to be in one). There comes a time when we realise that we can't do everything and I'm glad you have acknowledged this. We had wonderful home care for Mum and Dad whilst he was still at home (he had Alzheimer's Disease) and if ours in Australia is anything like you have in America I know you will be really pleased. The love and care you have given Ron over all these years is evident and I know you will be surrounded by your loving family. Love Chris