I married very young and I had three children to my first husband, after about 3 years of drunken abuse and violence and continuous unemployment, I got a full time job. We separated only a few months after I started working full time. I then proceeded to do my nurses registration training and tried to provide for my children as best I could.

My sons were very difficult, they were always in trouble at school and I was constantly being called from work to come and try to sort out whatever drama they had caused.
During this time there father had disappeared and we had no contact with him. I tried to be both mum and dad, but this is very difficult. I had to work, we needed money as does everyone.
Finally one day they were truant from school and my brother happened to see them walking down the street. He picked them up to return them to school, they kicked and punched him and his friend. They then demolished the principals office and one of them assaulted a police officer. I got a telephone call at work and was told they were at the police station. All three of them including my oldest daughter.
When I arrived at the police station the sergeant informed me that he had placed a care and control order on the children and that it was his expectation that the department of family services would offer me some assistance with managing there behaviour.
This did not occur, the family services department took my children into care and became furious with the police sergeant because they did not like the care and control order he had written and they wanted a care and protection order. This resulted in a huge battle between the police who maintained that the children did not need protection because they were not in any danger and were never abused or neglected by me. The family services argued that although they were aware that the children were not in danger or being abused or neglected, they just like the care and protection order better because it was nicer for the kids.
I remember telling this story to my work colleagues at the time and thinking, if someone were telling me this I would not believe a word of it.
The family services seemed determined to make my life impossible. They would suggest I should do something ie family counselling, which I would dutifully do only to be told that I needed to to something else and something else and on and on. During this time it would appear that they were telling my children that I did not want them back.
I thought I had managed to salvage a relationship with my children despite all of this, I have with my daughters, I have a great relationship with them.
Now some of you may remember that last year my two sons came to stay with me and my husband. We lent them both enough money to buy a car each, the expectation was that they would pay us back but without interest. There were constant crisis that I had to bale them out of from traffic tickets to cars being towed away paying for qualifications to help them get work, they would lose jobs and be out of work and not be able to pay board etc... then on Christmas eve, they both got very drunken and became threatening to my husband, my husband is 54 and would not be able to defend himself against two young fit men. I can hear you all thinking we should have thrown them out then. but we did not, for three more months we let them stay here until the tension got too much. I then asked them to make plans to leave, offered to help them to save for a place of there own. What they did is promptly move in with there sister, and start phoning me with abuse and telling me what a terrible mother I am, they are bringing up all of the past and accusing me of things that are not true.
I can't get my head around it, I don't understand why if they hate me that much they came to live in my house and accepted a loan from me? why were they all affectionate and loving to me when they lived here if they had so much anger from the past?
They have both told me that I am no longer there mother and one of them is addressing me as Alice.
This has brought back this very traumatic time in my life that I thought was behind me, I am so devastated and I must admit very angry. I hope that you can all understand how difficult it is for me to share this, but I really need the prayer warriors at the moment.
Alice.