Just a funny poem I wrote, for all you cat lovers out there who have ever tried to decorate for Christmas. I hope you enjoy it, and that you all have very happy holidays with your families and friends!!!

The Crazy Cat Lady Tries for a Very Martha Stewart Christmas
By Marji Alexa Weber

‘Twas the night before Christmas
And all thru the house
The kitties were sleeping
And dreaming of mouse,

Or turkey and gravy
Or stuff from a can;
Mike dreams of cow barns,
Warm milk in a pan.

The tree’s all a-sparkle,
And so is the floor,
Sweet Lucy-furr’s napping
And waiting for more!

There’s balls under tables
Under chairs and the bed;
Thank God for plastic,
Or Lucy’d be dead.

She snorfels the trunk
And sharpens her claws,
I hang balls, she bats them
With nary a pause.

At least it’s still upright,
My poor little tree,
De-balled and de-tinseled
By Lucy for me!

There’s been a small train wreck—
Inky played with the switch;
The caboose has gone missing,
The engine’s in a ditch.

The artistic gift-wrapping
That took me so long—
With hand-made paper, perfect bows,
All done to Christmas songs—

Is just a bit messy
With fang marks and spit,
Ribbons are dangling,
And the tags? Well, oh, shoot!

And the dried-flower nosegays
All golden and glitter,
Fuzz-butts thought it was color-
Coordinate litter!

Spot’s asleep in the manger
‘Cause I used real hay;
Martha Stewart, you’re CATLESS,
We can’t do it this way!!!